I learned this some time ago, but it deserves a post as a reminder and as a demonstration that this simple principle can surprise yourself with the results.
My boyfriend, Mike, has been looking for work ever since his original job fell through (on the day he arrived for his first day of work!). With 14 other displaced employees, the company eventually conceded that he should look for other opportunities and that’s what he’s been doing for the last 5 months. All of a sudden, he finds himself with 2 offers from two compelling companies. Ideally he would find a job in Las Vegas, (where he has been determined to set up shop) but one of his offers came from a company in Boulder, CO (the other was in Las Vegas). Now, there was nothing wrong with Boulder and nothing wrong with the company. In fact, it was probably the smart choice; but, his desire to live in Las Vegas, where he had already established himself in the climbing community and gotten psyched on the rock there, superceeded any ‘logical’ reasoning. He had to turn down the Boulder job. He wanted to live in Las Vegas.
The surprising twist to this story comes a few days later when the Boulder Company contacts him and offers him the same opportunity but out of Las Vegas. Essentially, he could live in Las Vegas and still work for them! This would entail a fair bit of commuting to Boulder every month or so and maybe an extended commitment initially, but over time, could be reduced to something more ‘reasonable.’ Think of it, Boulder in the summer, Las Vegas in the winter. He has the absolute perfect arrangement. And, to my point of asking for what you want….even though he didn’t ask the Boulder company for this incentive, he didn’t back down from what was important to him, which opened up a door to allow this option to present itself. And, he didn’t settle, which means, he has no regrets or misgivings about his choice. He’s a happy man! And, we all know the rest of us are jealous! 🙂